When it comes to happiness, we have it backwards.
We think that when we get or accomplish something we want, we are going to be happier. I call it the “I will be happier when” myth. We all know it…I will be happier when I get a better house, when my husband is nicer to me, when I lose twenty pounds, when I like my work more, and so on.
We spend all of our life force and energy trying to change those circumstances to be happier, but the research clearly shows that that doesn’t work.
When I was in my 20s, I had it backwards, too. That’s why I focused much of my thoughts and talents doing the things that I assumed would “get” me the happiness I so craved.
But when I achieved all these goals and reached what appeared to be the pinnacle moment in my career—signing 5,000 copies of my best-selling book and giving a speech to 8,000 fans—I realized that I still felt like there was something missing in my life! I still wasn’t happy.
I spent the next several years entrenched in the most up-to-date research on positive psychology, and interviewed 100 truly happy people about what they did that was unique. That’s when I learned the truth about happiness—that certain habits can raise your happiness set-point regardless of genetics or life circumstances.
It doesn’t matter what you want in life. The reason you want it is because you want to be happier. But getting happy first is the fastest way to get what you want, because when you become happier, everything just falls into place. It’s the Law of Attraction!
When I speak to large audiences about these happiness principles, people are always surprised and thrilled to learn that they can affect their happiness without driving themselves crazy trying to perfect their environment, relationships or career. There’s a tremendous amount of freedom in that.
I’ve seen this process work for all kinds of people from all walks of life, at every age. I even saw my mother, who was my first guinea pig for this process, go from chronically lethargic and depressed to positive and joyful about life when she was in her 80s!
To me, there’s nothing more important than being happier. It’s our birthright. Why we’re on the planet.
With love and happiness,
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