I was once working with a woman who told me how she was preparing for new love to come into her life. She was ’doing’ all the right things…
Every day, she was getting clearer and clearer about what she wanted. She had made her “list” about all the qualities she wanted in her mate and what she wanted the relationship to be like.
She was also making “space” in her life for her new love—cleaning out her closet, nightstand, even the vanity drawer in her bathroom, etc.
Everything seemed to be in order!
Then, I asked her about her ex. How did she feel about giving up that relationship completely? She said:
“Oh, I am ready all right!! That SOB was a no good, cheating, lying jerk and he makes me sick!”
This was the energy that she would be taking into her new relationship! This was going to be exactly what she was going to receive again and again and again!
Have you ever thought or talked about your ex the way my client did? Do you do it now?
Do you still feel wronged by what someone in your past did to you? Have you truly let that person off the hook?
Or do you still find yourself rehashing the “story” of what happened?
Here’s a good way to tell if you’ve made peace with your past and truly hold no grudges against your ex:
Ask yourself if you wish for them to find happiness with another partner. I’m talking about a really great relationship—one in which your ex feels wonderfully fulfilled, has phenomenal sex, and has no question that they’ve found the right partner.
Did you cringe when you just read that? Does the thought of your ex moving on and being truly happy without you make your stomach turn?
If so, you’ve just discovered an area you must resolve within yourself in order to find the right partner, because this is the truth:
I know, I know:
You were possibly very hurt by your ex. Perhaps things got really ugly. Maybe you gave your heart and soul to this person, and they rejected you.
How can you possibly muster the desire for your ex to find happiness in love?
Here’s why you should:
Because the universe is all loving and all-giving.
Nobody is better than anyone else, and everyone is equally worthy of receiving. Therefore, your ex deserves to find his or her soul mate, just like you do. By thinking or wishing that your ex is kept from such happiness, you’re keeping yourself from it, too.
If you are stuck in resentment and wanting your ex to “pay” for what he or she did to you, then you are out of alignment with the all-giving, all-receiving energy of the universe.
Resentment, bitterness, and anger are all low-energy emotions, and they cut you off from the high-energy emotions that will attract the right relationship to you.
If my client keeps thinking her ex is a jerk, this is the energy that predominates her being—NOT the energy of wanting love and creating the space for it.
Low energy is not attractive to a quality partner. This means that she could have the right man standing right in front of her, but her low energy will not be a match for his high energy, and so he will not be attracted to her.
People who are loving and capable of healthy relationships are free of bitterness and resentment, and they will only be attracted to other people who are also free of these negative, low-energy emotions.
In other words, no matter how many lists she makes or closets she cleans out, the strong negative energy she has toward her ex will continuously sabotage her best efforts to create a healthy relationship. In essence, her feelings toward her ex cancel out her positive energy to find love, keeping her stuck in neutral gear.
Was she being punished? No!
The universe only knows how to give us exactly what we’re putting out into the world. If we are carrying out low-energy emotions, that’s exactly what we’ll attract.
All the universe does is say yes to the request that you ask the most powerfully!
In other words, if you still harbor negative feelings about someone in your past, then this is a huge flood of negative energy you are putting out, and the universe will continue to say YES to that.
See, the universe never judges, or questions what you are doing and thinking. It just RESPONDS to you with more of what you’re putting out.
This is exactly what was happening for my client. She kept re-creating negative patterns in her relationships because she kept putting out negative energy.
In order for her (and you) to truly create something different in life, she has to absolutely stop the negative energy flow generated by her unresolved feelings toward her ex.
And just how do you do this?
The answer is forgiveness. You have to forgive your ex—and most importantly yourself—in order to free yourself from the past and step into a flood of positive energy. Only then will the universe say YES to that.
Do you think you’re ready for love? More importantly, do you still talk negatively about your ex?
No matter how many dates you go on or how clear you get on what you want in a partner, you will keep attracting more heartbreak and disappointment if you have any lingering resentment toward someone in your past.
This is flooding your energy field negatively, ensuring you will just get more of the same.
In Chapters 3 and 4 of my program Self Love For True Love, you’re going to learn how to truly release the past, your ex, and all the negative energy that has been sabotaging your best attempts at finding true love.
This program contains the same exercises, meditations, and affirmations I use with my personal coaching clients—including an energetic exercise to help you discern your repetitive energy patterns when it comes to relationships.
Remember, everything is energy and the universe only wants to say YES to you. My program will help you to clear out all the negative energy and step into the positive energy that will finally allow you to attract true love—and create a completely different future.
As you make your way through the program, you’ll find true forgiveness for the people in your past—and for yourself—allowing you to shift your heart, shift your thoughts, and shift your life!
Once you do this, you’ll realize all that “stuff” you were doing to find love—making lists, clearing out space, going on countless dates—is really secondary to the more important work of bringing up the energy within you.
When you step into this higher energy through releasing the past, finding love becomes delightfully easy!
Throughout the program, you’ll also discover what else may be holding you back from creating a new, healthy relationship—and tap into your innate power to create a new reality:Create Your Energetic Shift
Here’s to your loud, resounding YES from the universe.
P.S. Shame, remorse, and regret are actually negative energies that erode the very core of you and keep you from finally experiencing soul mate love.
Instead, you must learn to treat yourself with love, compassion, and forgiveness and bask in these higher energies.
This is the key to living in alignment with soul mate love:Say Yes To The Higher Energy Of Love