If you’re here, you’re single.
And if you’re here… you don’t want to be. Am I right?
Personal development educator specializing in relationships and sexuality
And while it would be easiest to chalk up your single-dom (singleness? singlehood?) to ‘not having met the right person yet’ – that belittles the experiences you’ve had.
Because you’ve been putting yourself out there.
You’ve been keeping your eyes open at parties for “the friend of a friend” that you happen to meet. You’re on the apps. You might even pay for some of the premium versions or the matchmaking site memberships.
You’ve seen the good, the bad, and the red-flag ugly.
And maybe you meet someone, hit it off… and then it fizzles out or he ghosts you or it just doesn’t… GO anywhere.
So you put yourself back on the market, looking for the right kind of person who’s emotionally available for the kind of relationship you want.
And you’re stuck in this seemingly endless cycle of developing a relationship only to discover you’ve wasted valuable time on something that doesn’t work out.
So you’re back at square one, searching for something that’s worth your energy…… only to have it happen all over again.
What’s a girl gotta do to put an end to the dead end dating, already?!
And I blame movies and romance novels.
Hear me out.
30-Days of Tips, Strategies and Insights to help you stop wasting precious time on go-nowhere relationships
Our entire lives, we’re conditioned that when we finally meet “The One,” it will be magical.
The first date is a whirlwind, you’re giddy with anticipation, and he doesn’t wait the clichèd 3 days to call before he asks to see you again.
Eventually he’s got you alone, perhaps in front of a fairy-lit gazebo and he gently leans in for the. best. kiss. you’ve. ever. had.
And fade to black…
See, here’s the problem…
Movies and novels don’t give you all the OTHER stuff - the real, not manufactured stuff - that goes into a relationship!
Cinderella danced with the Prince one time and married the guy. What about when she got stuck at work or his feet smelled or both of them were grumpy at the same time and started picking a fight?
And the happiest married couples you know… they figured it out on their own.
They figured out that relying on sexual or emotional chemistry is dangerously faulty.
That this chemistry is what makes you keep the wrong person around for far longer than you should.
That you put up with a dead-end relationship or stick with the wrong person because you feel the butterflies or spark and think that it’s “a sign.”
This walking-on-air, dying-to-see-him-again, checking your phone 10 times, blissful FEELING that we’ve all been duped to think is LOVE is the #1 reason so many women end up wasting precious years of their lives with men who will never give them what they actually want…
And this is why relying on chemistry in your dating life is so dangerous.
Frankly speaking (and I’m sorry to burst your bubble here) - this kind of chemistry is our body’s outdated, primal response to survival-related evolutionary signals given off by another person.
This chemistry does NOT PREDICT the likelihood of a successful relationship.
It doesn’t tell you whether this person is a good long-term match for you.
It doesn’t give you a heads up when you’re skipping red flags left and right and pushing forward on something that wouldn’t otherwise deserve even a second date.
I know this isn’t what you want to hear.
It’s not what your heart wants to believe!
Because we’ve been conditioned to believe that if there’s chemistry, everything else will work out.
That “love can conquer all.”
If you’ve bought or rented a home, this process will feel very familiar.
First, you understand your needs.
What’s your budget? How long of a commute to work do you want to have?
How many bedrooms and bathrooms do you NEED (and how many would you like to have?) What are must-haves and nice-to-haves in a potential residence?
What are some deal breakers? Does the neighborhood matter?
All of these questions are ones you ask yourself before you even start looking for a home. Because the homes you look at must fit within these parameters in order to even be considered.
Then once you have your list of potential homes in hand, you start your search. You let yourself get an overall feel for the place, but then you start looking at the details.
Is the master bedroom big enough? Are you REALLY okay with an outdated kitchen? Is on-street parking a big deal or did you really need that 2-car garage?
Then you make the offer. It’s accepted - and there’s STILL more due diligence.
You hire an inspector to make sure the house is sound before signing the paperwork. You get the pest control company to make sure you don’t have a termite infestation. You run tests or do inspections to make sure you really know what you’re getting into.
And then you settle in.
But when we date someone, we mix up this order!
We find the house, write the offer, THEN decide our boundaries.
Then we sign the final paperwork and move in (thinking the house might change). Then we might do an inspection (or maybe not).
And we wonder where it all went wrong when we’re woken up at 3 in the morning with a leaky roof and a line of ants from the basement to the attic and back again.
If you’re still following my metaphor, and you’re realizing that I’m likely onto something…
I’ve got some good news for you.
You can create a process for dating that removes chemistry from the equation and helps you find the person you’re really meant to be with - the ACTUAL “one” you’re looking for.
Because here’s the thing: real, long-term, lasting and healthy relationships have 7 Foundations of Forever:
And chemistry isn’t on the list.
The thing is - chemistry not only doesn’t predict how long or healthy a relationship will be… it also doesn’t last.
The research isn’t conclusive on how long the initial (chemistry, or lust) stage lasts… but it’s VERY clear that it’s only the first step in building a relationship with someone.
Which means if you haven’t taken the time to be crystal clear on what you’re looking for (and stick to it!)…
You’re back to the meeting-excitement-fizzle-look again cycle that is wearing you out and keeping you single.
But when you take the time UP FRONT to be clear on things like:
You’re taking the first step in the most direct, effective and fastest way to get exactly what you want: that deeply fulfilling relationship for life.
Doesn’t that sound more exciting than the exhausting emotional rollercoaster you’re on right now?
Most women don’t approach dating this way. They lead with their heart on their sleeve, relying on “feeling good” with someone they’ve recently met as a good reason to fall in love.
Because if it feels good, it is good… right? (Wrong!)
Is this you?
Do you feel a spark with this new person and wonder if this is it? Do you put a lot of meaning into chemistry and attraction?
If you answered yes… then it doesn’t matter how intelligent, educated, smart, clever, or amazing you are…
You’re doing yourself a disservice and dumbing yourself down when it comes to relationships.
(How Putting The Practical Into Romance Leads To Magical Love)
When you are looking for someone to date, I want you to put the same effort into finding him as you would into finding your next home.
I want you to make a list of your needs, your requirements, and your nice-to-haves.
And I don’t mean to write out an entire 5-subject notebook full of must-haves in checklist format that you take with you to every date.
But what do you REALLY need from someone to be happy?
What are your non-negotiables?
What are your deal breakers?
Be real with yourself here - because anything less is doing yourself zero favors and leaving you open to falling into something with the wrong person - yet again - because you “felt something.”
Remember: we’re putting an end to dead-end dating here. We’re not going to let this happen to us by accident anymore.
When you approach dating this way, you’ll start to realize that the purpose of dating is NOT to find out if you are wildly attracted to the person sitting across from you at dinner.
Dating is merely a means to get to know someone.
By the end of date one, all you need to know is if this is someone you would like to learn more about because you sense he could be compatible with you.
Yes, this may not sound “magical” or “romantic” or even sexy.
But, while fun and exciting, that can’t-keep-our-hands-off-each-other feeling does not mean you are compatible.
Magic fizzles quickly. Chemistry is fleeting.
If you’re looking for a one night stand or a hook-up buddy, magical passion is exactly what you need!
If you want to risk wasting time on a relationship that won’t take you where you want to go - by all means, stick with the chemistry.
But for a serious life partner, someone who will walk next to you through the unexpected twists and turns of life…
Someone that can have fun with you both on adventures AND while you’re having a lazy day at home…
Someone who makes you feel comfortable, connected, and cared for…
Someone that you can trust with your ENTIRE SELF and know that he accepts you for who you are…
You must have something that transcends chemistry, magic and physical attraction.
True compatibility. That’s what’s really sexy.
All this doesn’t mean that you’re not going to think he’s good looking. Compatibility isn’t a one-way ticket to the altar with Shrek.
But the basis of your relationships needs to be more than what’s between the sheets.
YES, I want you to be sexually attracted to your partner!
I want you to think about him and fantasize about him and get worked up when he’s around.
But when that’s ALL your relationship is… how happy does that really make you, anyway?
I’ve been speaking and educating on personal development topics for over 30 years. And I’ve had my clinical practice for even longer.
And in all that time, I’ve met hundreds (if not thousands) of women who are amazingly successful in their professional lives… who have to think and strategize at extremely high levels… who are leaders in their organizations…
But have no clear path or vision for their romantic life!
They’re still just operating on the highly romanticized, happily-ever-after stories from fairy tales (and yes, I still blame Hallmark and Harlequin).
There’s no practicality in this approach. Which is what leads to heartache.
When I show them how to use the SAME SKILLS in their dating lives as they do for their careers or businesses… they meet their compatible forever partner surprisingly fast!
Sometimes it will only be a matter of months after changing their approach that my clients and patients will fall in love - and even get engaged!
They’ll know a man is “The One,” not just because they feel a deep and abiding affection and attraction to him, but because he’s so perfectly suited to them and to their goals, dreams and desires.
Their love stories aren’t flash-in-the-pan romances.
They are solid, secure, sweet relationships that can overcome the conflicts of life and love together.
These relationships contribute to their overall health and wellbeing (instead of depleting it!)
Over the years, I’ve come to realize how utterly critical it is for single women to utilize a DIFFERENT APPROACH to dating than most of us have been taught to use our entire lives.
Because the way most women date is frankly a time-waster.
By focusing on the chemistry and the “feeling,” women are stuck in dead-end relationships that steal YEARS from their lives… instead of using practical strategies they already know how to use… and applying them to their dating lives.
I decided to create a step-by-step program that teaches a woman a new approach to finding her forever person in a wiser and more pragmatic way, so she can realize her dream of marriage, family and lasting love SOONER.
I hope by now you understand that being practical is still sexy.
That approaching your dating life this way doesn’t remove the magic…
But instead it ADDS to it.
With The Soulmate Method, you’ll discover the magic that comes when you have a real, deep connection to someone that you KNOW is a good fit for you…
Because when you have that level of trust in your relationship, that’s when you can truly let yourself be free.
With The Soulmate Method, you’ll approach dating as an exercise in SELF-CARE.
Because perhaps for the first time in your life, you’re putting YOURSELF first in dating. Discovering what you want, what you need, and what you’re ultimately looking for.
You’re standing up and saying that you’re worth the effort it takes to get what you REALLY want: a meaningful relationship that lasts.
You’ll spend time with yourself, understanding yourself on a deep level…
So you can bring that confidence, assurance and excitement to the relationship you crave…
I want you to fall into FOREVER LOVE - not “for right now” love that leaves you heartbroken and climbing back on the emotional rollercoaster.
If you don’t take the practical approach now… you’ll be forced to do it in a couple months when he turns out to be a jerk.
Or even worse, you’ll be divorcing someone who was never right for you.
You deserve to find someone who fits your life AND whom you love and adore, without wasting years falling for the wrong people.
In just 30-days, I’ll show you how to form a plan and strategy to vet the people you’re dating so you lower your chances of getting attached to the wrong person (and getting your feelings hurt)…
I’ll help you determine the right questions to ask (and when to ask them!) of yourself AND your potential Mr. Right - so you don’t get caught in the whirlwind before you know if you have a future together…
You’ll discover how to get to know someone without the distraction of sex and the attachment hormones that complicate things (how many times has that happened to YOU)?
This isn’t “duty dating” - you’re still going to have a blast on your dates while you’re learning the things you need to know to determine whether a date 2 or 3 is right for you.
You’ll discover the most valuable assets you have to offer in a relationship, which will raise your self-esteem.
You’ll stop paying so much attention to what a man thinks of you and pay more attention to qualifying HIM!
You’ll be able to distinguish between chemistry and true compatibility, so you won’t get swept away by feelings that affect your judgment and get you wrapped up with a Prince Charming look alike that turns toxic… or stuck back in the world of dead-end dating.
AND I’ll show you how to identify your attraction patterns that haven’t worked so well for you in the past, and how to change those patterns to create a whole new and better experience of love.
I’ll give you skills and strategies that will help you figure out who the right partner for you is - using everything that’s already there that you may have never simply taken the time to clarify and put into words before.
Things like your past history, your childhood, your little quirks, the parts of your personality that shine, the fears you have about your future, and how your partner plays into your overall life goals.
Simply put: This is more than a dating course.
It’s a course designed to help you become the best version of yourself so YOU are ready to meet the man of your dreams.
So YOU are ready for the relationship that you want.
And so YOU are prepared with the tools, skills, strategies & knowledge you need to go find it.
This will change the course of the rest of your life.
This 30-Day program will take you through a powerful exploratory process AND give you practical tips, conversation starters, activities and steps that will make finding your soulmate a much richer experience and a soul-gratifying process.
This program will help you understand what YOU want… so you’re more prepared to go find it in a meaningful way.
In our time together, you’ll become crystal-clear on not only what YOU have to offer - but what you’re looking for… AND help you navigate the overwhelming dating scene with a fresh perspective…
One that will help you find the relationship you want (and need)… FAST.
Everyday For 30 Days I’ll Send You…
These lessons will help you approach dating more efficiently, understand your past patterns, build the skills to get to know your potential love interests better, and show you the foundation on which you can build your relationships.
These will help you deepen the changes you’ll see. You’ll get crystal clear on your preferences and deal-breakers, and you’ll become the expert in how compatible you are with each of your dates.
As you go through these 30-Days with me, it’ll become painstakingly clear who is - and isn’t - a good fit for you and your life.
You’ll have armed yourself with self-knowledge and self-confidence about your worth when you meet someone new.
You’ll know exactly what you bring to the table and exactly how amazing you truly are.
And you’ll know what it will take for you to be gloriously and happily in love for the rest of your life.
It will eliminate the guesswork of choosing whom to say “yes” to, whom you should get to know better, and whom you can kindly decline.
There’s a reason the first thing we go over has to do with clarifying what you’re looking for in a relationship and from a partner… and it has everything to do with the fact that understanding what you want is the first thing you should be doing.
It’s exponentially more difficult to be successful in love if you have no idea what you’re looking for.
That’s how you end up falling in love by accident. That’s how you end up with Mr. Wrong or Mr. Right Now or Mr. I-Didn’t-Know-He-Was-Such-A-Jerk.
In this Phase, I’m going to help you figure out what’s right for YOU.
And I don’t mean just the checklist items of “what kind of job he has” or “is he close with his mother.”
But deep, intentional decisions like:
Because if you don’t know what you want… how will you find someone who is aligned with you?
Once you complete this phase, you’ll have a thorough, informed inventory of what your ideal relationship will look like - AND the type of man you want by your side as you live your life.
You’ll know what qualities you’re looking for in a person and what you want them to bring to the table.
You’ll finally STOP being vague and start knowing what you want.
We’ve already talked about why relying on chemistry to choose your love interests is a dangerous game. And that’s why we’re going to work on discovering COMPATIBILITY in Phase 2.
Compatibility is what will allow your relationship to go the distance - and being able to tell the difference between the two is critical for dating success.
Because yes, chemistry can be there when there’s no compatibility… BUT you can be compatible with someone AND have chemistry. (I know, I know - it would be nice if it was either/or, right?!)
Throughout this phase, I’ll show you how to quantify what chemistry makes you feel (so you can quickly tell the difference between the “zing” of meeting someone and the magic of meeting someone that’s right for you)…
PLUS I’ll help you identify those instinctual “chemistry” feelings so you can put them aside when you first start dating someone and leave your heart open to what it REALLY needs to know:
Is he right for me?
That leads us to what’s next:
Here’s the thing about dating: it’s really, really hard on your heart.
So part of this process is protecting that precious heart of yours so if he’s not the right person for you… it doesn’t hurt so much when you make the choice to part ways.
To do that, we HAVE to make dating a practical thing. We just don’t have a choice. We can no longer rely on romance and gut-feelings to bring us to the right person - or we’d be with him already.
In Phase 3, we’re going to look at your history and identify patterns of previous relationships - both that have served you, and that haven’t. Yes, we’re going to figure out where your exes were good for you, and where you could have done better.
Because we all have habits - and not all of them are good for us. So if we can increase your healthy habits and minimize the not-so-healthy ones, we’re setting you up for long-term love.
By now I’ve helped you develop a process for figuring out who’s right for you - and in Phase 3, I’m helping you create the process for allowing yourself to fall in love on purpose… and to choose the right person to do it with.
Which will prepare you for…
It’s just so nice to date someone you can feel GOOD about.
And it’s easy to get caught up in the flow, delightedly rafting down the river of good feelings and excitement for the future… on the way to the open ocean of love and deep satisfaction.
So how do you stay out of the whirlpools and mud puddles?
I’ll show you how to navigate the delightful (and sometimes challenging) parts of courtship - so you end up where you mean to be… and with your heart in one piece.
I’ll show you how to:
Look, you could leave it up to chance. You could decide that you’re going to keep risking your heart and your time and your energy.
Or you could decide that you’re worth the investment in yourself and your future.
You could decide that finding a real, healthy, lasting relationship is worth a little bit of work and a small investment now.
But to help make your decision a bit easier, I’m also including a special bonus:
Because finding a healthy relationship and KEEPING a healthy relationship require two different sets of skills.
Our gift to you: a free month of our Transformational Interview Series, where you’ll learn skills and strategies to radically improve all your relationships.
And while The Soulmate Method is the proven process you need to finally meet and date the man of your dreams… we can all use a regular dose of relationship help to keep the magic alive for years to come.
You’ll meet a new expert every month, sharing powerful skills and breakthroughs on relationship topics that matter: resolving conflict, setting boundaries, increasing intimacy, practicing genuine self-love… and much, much more.
In addition to monthly eye-opening interviews, we’ve got loads of surprises and bonus content to sweeten the deal (including these three gems in your first free month!)
If you love the program, do nothing. Every month you’ll receive another empowering interview for $19.97/mo. If you don’t want to receive any more interviews or bonus surprises, simply cancel (don’t worry – it’s super easy to do) and you won’t pay a thing.
Place your order now and be watching The Soulmate Method in a matter of minutes.
Take a full 7 days to examine the program and the workbook, take the steps I recommend when you go on your next date, and see if you are approaching dating with a newfound level of discernment and efficiency.
You should feel more confident and relaxed about whom you’re saying “yes” to for another date, and whom you’re kindly declining, based on practical, important factors that are true indicators of relationship longevity and happiness.
If, at the end of the 7 days, you decide this program isn’t going to help you find your soulmate more efficiently, simply let me know and I’ll refund your investment in FULL, no questions, no hassle.
This is my promise: You’ll find outstanding value from this program after putting it into practice for a full week or pay nothing!
You’ll be able to access the program within minutes of purchasing.
7 full days of unlimited access before deciding to keep it.
Not 100% thrilled? Let me know and I’ll give you a full refund.
You’re already doing the brave thing: you’re putting yourself out there and opening your heart up.
I want to help you pick the right person and reduce the chances of your heart being broken - again.
When you choose the right person, your life is simply more joyful. It’s easier.
You move forward with a sense of optimism and adventure. You have someone you can trust to be by your side as you navigate life’s ups and downs.
Someone who sees you for who you are and loves you BECAUSE of it.
When you pick the wrong person - you miss out on all of it.
You invite stress and drama into your world and life becomes a series of hardships. Small annoyances become daily struggles.
And before you know it… joy is missing from your world. Life is harder than it ever has to be because you don’t have “your person” by your side.
The tragic thing is that most people don’t know they’re with the wrong person until it’s too late and they’re too deep. They’ve been blinded by chemistry and infatuation, and they think “feeling right” is the same as BEING right.
You don’t have to choose wrong. You just have to choose YOU!
Choose The Soulmate Method and give yourself the best chance to choose the person that will elevate your life.
Who will bring you peace and satisfaction. Who will make you feel fulfilled.
Who will love you the way you want and deserve to be loved.
If you’re willing to face yourself in a way that’s both revealing and refreshing…
If you’re willing to face the hard stuff to find the best stuff…
If you’re willing to face your relationships to see what worked and what didn’t…
If you’re willing to determine what you simply want vs. what you need to be fulfilled…
Then I can’t wait to help you find the person who’s right for you.