Watching your relationship fall apart is one of the most gut-wrenching experiences you can have in life.
It’s heart-breaking to see that a relationship that was once a source of so much joy and comfort has now become a source of pain and disappointment.
You hate to admit it, but your relationship is at the breaking point.
Your mind keeps telling you to stay and work things out, but your heart wants you to leave.
Things haven’t been good between you for quite some time.
Your fights have left deep wounds and terrible emotional scars.
Clinical psychologist and marriage counselor for over 40 years
Or maybe you’ve drifted apart and are now sharing a home without sharing a life. The sex is non-existent or perfunctory.
Perhaps you’ve been betrayed. Or have been the betrayer.
And now you can’t even talk to your partner anymore. Not without a good deal of eye-rolling or finger-pointing.
You don’t want to break up, but you can’t go on living this way the rest of your life.
You’re in distress.
And you keep asking yourself, “Where did it all go wrong?”
When your love was new, there was bountiful forgiveness, acceptance and generosity. There were so many happy moments, so many great conversations, so much affection and laughter.
Sure, there were challenges and misunderstandings and sometimes even fights, but the good times were many and the bad were few.
It was easy to believe back then that things would always be that way between you.
Now, the negative feelings you once suppressed come out all too easily. Small irritations are like fingers on the chalkboard. The way they talk, the way they chew, their annoying little habits…it all gets on your nerves.
You’ve tried everything you can think of to get things back on track, to no avail.
Is this the end?
Or is there hope that your relationship can be saved?
This is one of the most important questions you’ll ever ask yourself.
The answer to that question can change the course of the rest of your life.
And you may be searching for a sign that you can still turn it around.
If you relate to any of this, here’s what I’ve come to believe from my 40+ years as a psychotherapist.
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No relationship can escape challenges or disappointment. Even people who once deeply loved each other can lose hope and confidence that they will stay together.
There comes a time in all relationships that have been neglected or traumatized by betrayal or fighting that the couple must make a decision about their future.
This is the critical moment where you either muster up the courage to do whatever it takes to rescue your love, or you succumb to the desire to give up and let the relationship die. Go your separate ways. Start your lives over. Forge a new life, alone this time.
The mere thought of ending your relationship can put you in despair!
I’ve seen it happen much too often in my sessions with couples.
One person looks out the window, unmoved, as the other one pleads for reconciliation…understanding…acknowledgement …anything.
Once you or your partner have crossed into that zone of detachment, it’s very, very difficult to resuscitate what was once a very close and loving bond.
To put it frankly, you or your partner just won’t care enough to even try to make things better or work things out. They’ll already be planning their new life without you, rather than spend another minute wondering where it all went wrong and how to fix it.
After working with thousands of couples over the course of four decades, I want to tell you that if you’re here reading this, and you find yourself longing to get back the magic you once felt with your partner, even if that longing is fading quickly, there is hope.
There is hope that your partner will long for your embrace again.
There’s hope that you will once more feel effortlessly attracted to them and vice versa.
There’s a good chance that you’ll fall back in love, urgently and completely, and revel in that love together.
But if you want any of those things to happen, you can’t wait.
Your relationship won’t magically get better on its own. YOU must take a heroic step toward doing what’s right for you and your partner, even if your partner is not 100% interested or even committed at this moment.
As long as there is still a trace of the desire to make things better from both partners, the effort won’t be in vain.
You won’t need to settle for a mediocre or cobbled relationship, you can create a relationship that’s even better than the one you had before things started to fall apart, no matter what you’ve tried in the past or how long you’ve been “working” at it.
I’ve seen couples on the verge of divorce start to work as a team again…
…and feel revived and excited about their future.
I’ve seen couples develop honest intimacy…
…when only months before a betrayal rocked their love and they never thought they would trust again.
I’ve witnessed partners surprised at the passion and tenderness that’s still there between them…
…even if they had drifted apart and were sleeping in separate bedrooms, convinced their romantic life together was long gone.
As long as a couple is willing to make their relationship a priority for the time it takes to heal their love, I can help pull them back from the brink.
And my plan can help you, too.
Many couples come to me in order to establish who is right, who’s wrong, and to have me help “fix” the other person.
This is entirely the wrong approach. It only wastes valuable energy.
Instead of getting mired in who is the victim and perpetrator, I lead couples through this highly effective 3 step plan:
It’s not that your partner lied to you, or that they’re spending too much time at work. It’s not that they’re a poor listener or that you’re too demanding.
The root of all these complaints lies elsewhere, and it’s usually in how you interact with each other.
Certain behaviors consistently cause distance in couples. You must recognize these (often unconscious) behaviors and stop them immediately.
It’s only when you can diagnose the real problem that you can stop going around in circles and work on getting the love back.
In extreme situations, one partner just about drags the other into therapy, and the unmotivated partner doesn’t even acknowledge there’s anything wrong with the relationship or refuses to take any responsibility.
But how do you muster up the motivation if you already feel worn out?
You must have a kind of epiphany about your relationship that you haven’t had up until now. You have to connect to that part of you that still loves your partner and will do anything to get back the good feelings and devotion you once shared.
It’s only when you can gather the force of that sort of motivation that you’ll be able to go on to the third step.
If you want to assure that your relationship will fail, blame, score-keeping and grudges are the way to go!
Or, you can make rapid progress by focusing on a series of powerful behaviors and commitments that actually make a positive difference in how you’ll feel about each other.
Over the years I’ve identified 26 behaviors and commitments that are most effective for bringing about the greatest change in a relationship. Once you know what these are, it’s just a matter of selecting the ones most important in your relationship and implementing them.
You’ll measure your progress by how good you feel around your partner again, and how appreciative and kind they are in return.
I’ve made it my life’s work to help individuals and couples feel better about each other and about themselves, and be able to enjoy healthy, loving relationships.
I’ve had the pleasure of seeing hundreds of couples I’ve counseled fall back in love with each other. I’ve seen desperate, heartbroken lovers reconcile and find happiness again. I’ve seen families on the brink of destruction be made stronger and more resilient when partners put their energy into working together again.
Nothing else is more gratifying to me as a psychotherapist.
I believe a healthy, loving relationship is one of the greatest joys in life. I wanted to make my plan available to anyone who needed it.
This is why I developed the Relationship CPR program.
This program will show you how to identify the real problem behind your broken relationship by helping you evaluate which specific underlying behaviors have torn you apart, so you can stop the pain ASAP.
It will help you gain the motivation you need to heal your relationship with a special face-to-face exercise that has been known to bring couples to tears because they once again feel that magic that made them fall in love in the first place.
And finally, Relationship CPR will show you how to prioritize and enact the 26 new behaviors and commitments, so that you and your partner can resurrect your loving feelings for each other, fast.
The tools contained in Relationship CPR can help you create a relationship that’s far more loving and way more secure than what you had before.
They are specific to a relationship in peril, work quickly and are easy to follow.
This is the same treatment plan that I’ve used with couples of all ages, from all backgrounds and walks of life.
In Relationship CPR, you’ll learn the same 3-step process I’ve developed and used in my 40-year clinical practice helping couples repair their broken relationships.
I know that if you listen to the program with your partner, do the exercises and you are dedicated to transforming your relationship, you will experience more love, more understanding and more joy together. If you aren’t completely satisfied once you try out this program, you can return it hassle-free within the first 7 days. I’ll refund every penny, no questions asked.
Place your order and be reading or listening to Relationship CPR in a matter of minutes. Take a full 7 days to examine the materials, try the techniques and try out what works for you or your partner. See for yourself how much these foundational skills can transform your relationship, bring you closer to your partner, and help you create the kind of heroic love you’ve always wanted.
If, at the end of the 7 days, you decide this isn’t the right solution for you, simply let me know and I’ll refund your investment in FULL, no questions, no hassle. This is my promise: You’ll find outstanding value from this program after putting it into practice for a full week or pay nothing!
If you were one of my private practice clients, the tools and advice you’d receive from me would cost you thousands of dollars in fees. I know this isn’t realistic for most couples. This is why I’m thrilled to be able to offer Relationship CPR, a digital program you can do from the comfort of your own home that offers you my very best process for bringing the love and trust back to your relationship for a fraction of the cost.
Once you place your order, you’ll also begin receiving the Flourish newsletter—which means even more advice from our curated community of experts. We’ll send you articles with eye-opening insights and practical strategies you can put into practice right away. It’s completely free, and it’s our way of helping you flourish in every area of your life.
You’ll be able to access the program within minutes of purchasing.
7 full days of unlimited access before deciding to keep it.
Not 100% thrilled? Let me know and I’ll give you a full refund.
In counseling, there’s a moment that happens between a couple when I know things are at a turning point.
After weeks or even months of surly expressions, defensive body language, nasty outbursts and even tears, something happens between the couple.
There’s laughter. A gentle touch. A long sigh of relief.
And suddenly, it’s like someone threw back the curtains and opened up a window in a room that had been shuttered for years. There’s a profound shift in the energy in the room.
Laughter, a touch, a sigh. It may seem like a small thing, but it’s a rather big victory for a couple that could barely look at each other without contempt pouring from their very being.
Once that shift happens, things can improve quickly.
Partners stop sabotaging their progress, they are kinder, they listen better and start taking responsibility. But there must be faith first. There must be faith in the process, in each other, and in your own motivation to get back the love you once shared.
Relationship CPR gives you that faith. It is the path to relationship enlightenment. If you learn and practice the skills this program teaches, you’ll not only be a better and more successful intimate partner, but you’ll make all the relationships in your life better. You’ll invest your time and energy toward creating the kind of quality relationship that very few people experience or know.
I’ve seen people in the darkest hours of relationships fall more in love than they’ve ever been.
I know it can happen for you, too. There is hope, and you can get back the love you’ve lost.
I’d love to show you how.